Impact – Imported 12/07
Impact is a funny word, I think. And it’s really not used as much in any circle (I think) than how much it’s used in the Christian realm.
If anything, I’m more fascinated by what people are impacted by. Things that seem insignificant or strange to you have the most profound “impact” on someone else.
Over the last couple of weeks, I’ve heard stories from students who have remembered something from 4 to 6 years ago and remember it better than I can remember if I ate breakfast yesterday. For instance, I was chatting with a student and her leader last night and she begged me for the “Oven Dance.” The Oven Dance was 15 seconds of an improv sketch… seriously 4 years ago… but yet, she knew the entire story, and why it even existed.
And it really only exists because Trina, Ben and Al think it’s funny to make me inanimate objects during improv games and during our rendition of Hansel and Gretel, I was … the OVEN. So in order to get hot, I needed to do the oven dance. Ridiculous really.
Her leader mentioned that his favorite memory was a talk show several years ago we did about body image. I had forgotten all about it, but in talking with them I remember that it was the only time I ever said anything that wasn’t “facilitating” the conversation. The question came up during the panel, “You seem to be very confident with your self image… is that just a stage thing or is it for real?”
I remembered the question made me feel like every spotlight in earth focused straight on my head and the room was eerily quiet. I remember the feeling I had as I was about to answer . . . I was about to be brutally honest.
Here was my answer (from what I remember of it): I have always been “chubby.” In fact every woman in my family has struggled with their chubbiness. My mom had gastric bypass surgery and so did my sister. I also remember comments being said to me like, “if your not careful, you’ll end up just like mom.” I also remember how that impacted me. I was crushed that my “worth” was wrapped in my appearance. Then something deep inside of me resonated, “My worth has nothing to do with my appearance.” And I am positive at such a young age the Holy Spirit was protecting my heart and my mind from the lies of this world. I remember telling myself that day, if I choose to make a lifestyle change and “get skinny,” it will have nothing to do with because the world told me too, but because I have taken an active responsibility for my health. I firmly believe that if the “lies of the world” had set in, there would be no way that I could do what I do. Even for that I thank God for allowing me to not succumb to those, but seek earnestly to find my worth in Him.
I forget that “impact” takes mere moments. It’s a really convicting reminder.